Disabled Time

How Disability Changes Time Perception: From Fast to Slow

Time becomes faster when you can only go slow. I know this because I have experienced both: time goes slow (or a normal speed); and time goes fast. Disability changes your perception of time.

I have taken pride in how fast I can negotiate a busy high street, ‘it’s about maintaining momentum’. Likewise, I would tell myself, weaving in and out of the crowd, on my feet or a bike. Similarly, I used to crunch through words on a keyboard, not quite touch typing but not far off; just looking at the screen the words would appear as if by magic.

Time is now different.

Putting on socks takes five minutes (I have timed it). Putting shoes on can take 10. Getting fully dressed 30 minutes. Thinking time increases: you say to me, “let’s go out” or “can you get some milk” and I must be still to think about how to do it. To quietly let my body know that soon, it will be required to move. Writing a report takes weeks instead of days, as my one typing hand tiptoes across the keyboard, accurate but very slow.

The Frustration of ‘Slow Time’ in a Fast-Paced World

Glances at the clock shows the hour hand’s rushing progress, not the minutes, which become irrelevant. I come back from being out at 11am and after undoing, changing, toileting, drink making, etc. I look at the clock again, and it is 2pm. What! Where did that go?

It becomes noticeable when with somebody nondisabled, getting into a car, picking up a bag, getting your keys out and opening the door. There are two different time sets going on; a slow one for them and a fast one for you. You can feel they’re waiting like a glare, looking at the piece of your body which is underperforming the most. They itch to help, to speed things up to near their speed. If you have been engaging equally doing something beforehand. Like you’ve been sitting at a table, drinking tea, and then the next bit requires a doing something. Everything changes. From a can do to a can’t do, or I can do it, but it’s going to take me forking ages to do it.

Finding Comfort in Shared Time: The Joy of Disabled Companionship

That’s one of the reasons I love being around disabled people, you are on the same time zone. You wait for them, they wait for you, both the same speed, the same ticking of the clock. Today, I bought some flowers to plant in my garden. The young plants came in plastic trays of six. I arranged everything I needed. It was a Sunday. It was nice weather. I was alone, it took a long, long time, cutting, digging, transporting, all with one hand. But now I’ve planted them and they look nice.